Ask my husband if I'm a deep thinker, and he'll respond with a resounding "Yes!" I often pose rhetorical questions that I want to think about but have no idea how to answer. I'm haunted by the depth and complexity of a life that cannot be explained by simple devices of measurement or textbook definitions. I'm haunted by the pain I feel in my mind when I cannot reach a conclusion about an irreconcilable situation. I'm haunted by questions about God, humanity, life, love, the past, the future...all of it. Why can't I find answers to my questions? Why is there so much ambiguity surrounding my every breath? And why, when I feel I reach some sort of end to my search, am I skeptical and look for more? I'm held captive to my brain which is imprisoned by these haunting thoughts...
I am beginning to realize a deep need to put my thoughts, speculations, and curiosities into writing. Not that I always reach any conclusion by doing so, but in some way it helps me. If I have the liberty to think freely about the questions of life, I also have the liberty to write freely about my thoughts surrounding those questions. Why not exercise my liberty to do so?
No comments:
Post a Comment